Hello (yes, bog standard 1st post title)

um. hi. anyone out there?

this isnt my first blog post. i actually had a blog that in which i faithfully whined on friendster *hides face in shame because no one cool uses friendster anymore and i desperately yearn to be accepted in the exclusive uber sleek social posse of facebook users* but that was an age ago, after graduating from high school, when i was young, dumb, bored and frustrated. the friendster blog provided me an audience of friends and 'friends' who were subliminally suckered into reading a blow by blow account of my boredom and the loneliness and frustration that seems to accompany boredom wherever it goes.

but i outgrew friendster, moved on to myspace and subsqeuently facebook, plus i was having too much fun to sit around writing about how much fun im having. on a side note, though, i did have a small blog on myspace detailing a few of my adventures but because i didnt have may friends on myspace, i ditched it.

so why start again? its friday, i just woke up from a crit induced coma (i see myself writing about it sometime in the near future) , had breakfast and swore to myself id get going on my tech assignment at noon. i went on youtube and from one video to another, was lead to a video on the cyclic nature of internet addiction. The person (i wont say whom or what video it was because i dont like giving publicity to anyone) was fasinated by youtube and jumped on the bandwagon of millions of 'vloggers' (awful word, that) spitting out their shite in front of the video recorder and billions of people waste their time watching people watching them back which got me thinking about blogging again. a lot of my friends have interesting blogs, some with truckloads of readers, others with a few faithful audience (usually a devoted significant other or family member), but they're all forms of self expression and you could get some nice feedback, adulation, or the occassional inappropriate remark..but any attention is good attention. and i like attention. i like it when people notice something new ive done, a new shirt im wearing, the funny way i eat an apple, the quirky way i pronounce some words, the tattered state of my running shoes or the evil looking pus filled pimple on my face that is just begging to be popped.

yes. i am an attention whore. ive used the A word a few times now. i should find another word to replace it. This is what dictionary.com gave me:

absorption, application, assiduity, consideration, contemplation, debate, deliberation, diligence, engrossment, heed, heedfulness, immersion, industry, intentness, mind, scrutiny, study, thinking, thought, thoughtfulnes, awareness, big rush, brace, concern, consciousness, looking after, ministration, notice, observation, recognition, regard, spotlight, tender loving care, TLC, treatment, addresses, advertence, advertency, alertness, application, assiduity, attentiveness, circumspection, civility, complaisance, concentration, consideration, courtesy, deference, devoirs, diligence, ear, fixation, heed, limelight, mindfulness, note, notice, obedience, observation, perception, prevenience, regard, respect, study, thought, vigilance, watchfulness

i quite like spotlight, limelight, although both can't be used the same way that attention is utilised. but i rephrase: i am a spotlight whore. Not to be confused with the diva like drag queen worship of celebrity, but a silently, secretly simmering pot of excitement concealed in the realm of my emotions when another being devotes a few seconds of their lives to me, my silly two pence worth of opinions and my insignificant-in-the-grander-scheme-of-things existance.

i guess thats why i like it when a bloke fancies me, or i meet a new person whom id really like to be friends with: the attention. when there is an intial attraction, and im happy being the object of their affection, good conversation flows like delicious silky golden threads between our mouths and ears, (possibly loins as well but lets not go there) engulfing us in this 'warm' kind of coccoon of comradery, intimacy and a certain intrigue. actually this whole post is pointless except for the statement i like an audience.

i have no idea what this blog will be about, or whether im going to be completely uninhibited and spill my guts into 1's and 0's with all my dirty little secrets or if i shall be quiet reserved. Most of the time im sarcastic and dont really make sense and my stories are all over the place i cant be bothered with proper punctuation or capitalisation of the appropriate letters.

if im being completely honest with myself, starting the blog with a rant is a way to procrastinate doing tech. and laundry. and japan holiday visa. and household chores. and take a shower. OMG OMG OMG.

but anyway, pay attention to me, world for i am blogging! fark yeah.